Poem172 Wish

I woke this morning to see
a sunrise
and your smile

Things just aren't the same
since you came in

I've learned to walk the roads,
I've never seen,
because you saw

I've seen the things
I'd never thought I'd see

I've learned to show the world
that I see
cause you're there

You've seen the things
I thought no one could see

I can see the world
through your eyes
and you see my world
through me

You're the second part
that other half of me.

Poem152 Untitled

I hurt so many just by being
who I am, just by saying
what I say.
I use the ones who call me friend
in ways they just can't see
and worst to me
is that I do it
Indifferently.
I care,
but I don't care
I want to care,
but I don't care
I try to care,
but I don't care
I'm such an ass,
How can someone be
so self-centered?
I hate the way I treat people
Separate, separate
always separate
always separate from me.
No attachments
Nothing strong
Nothing that will last,
not a human care

And I wonder why I'm so alone.

Poem163 Untitled

So many fakes
with words that mean
nothing
it's all so hollow. . .
I ask for truth and all I get
is sugar

Sweet, Sweet
but meaningless
empty words
No substance!
No meaning!
No Worth!

Am I the only one who sees?

Poem161 Untitled

I'm sometimes scared
I'll never find someone
who fits. . .
I'm unhappy with most people
and it seems so slim I'll find
someone who can make me feel. . .
what I wish I could

Poem157 Liar

The best liars, tell the truth all the time
To better disguise, thier lies
And I am the best of liars
For I, never lie
At least, my sweet, not to you. . .
Never to you. . .
Trust me (smile)

As I am the best of liars
I'd never lie, to you.

Poem171 Untitled

I wrote this on 1/2/05 on the back of a bank receipt. It doesn't seem that good to me, but writing it made me feel a whole lot better.

The colors swirl
and I swirl with them
Floating through my mass delusion
My chest feels empty
I'm just a shell
a candy-coating over nothing
A chameleon blending in
with everything because
he isn't real.